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spacejailed

PARENTING 101. AN ANTI-GUIDE BY THE ARGENTS

dylanships

PARENTING 101: AN ANTI-GUIDE BY THE ARGENTS

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Mitch Albom writes in The Five People You Meet In Heaven:

“All parents damage their children. It cannot be helped. Youth, like pristine glass, absorbs the prints of its handlers. Some parents smudge, others crack, a few shatter childhoods completely into jagged little pieces, beyond repair.”

The Argents, I think, are a pretty perfect example of how one should not treat their child, and I’m gonna tell you why.

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petrichorandjasmine

These points, already great, have become even more important in light of season 3b and the new Argent Code (though I’m inclined to call it the Allison Code). The way Allison was raised pre-werewolf reveal, discussed above, is something that I think is frequently glossed over compared to the manipulative actions of her family post-werewolf reveal. Reading Allison’s character as only developing post-werewolves is a big mistake, and frankly is a disservice to her development as a person. In particular, reading Allison’s new Code is a particular insight into how her mindset has developed (for the better), in spite of her upbringing.

Keep reading

doctrowho

The Problem With Teen Wolf

shadowknight1224

I’ve seen this before, but I couldn’t put it into words: Teen Wolf is a show of deliberate superficiality, of an intense underestimation of its audience; where the scenes that matter, the scenes that have all the effort and thought put into them, are those meant to stimulate the senses or the emotions without actually engaging intellectually: characters slowly walking in the darkness with spooky music playing the background, cheap deaths, deformed monsters, manpain, any scene meant to bring a tear to your eye, dramatic reveals, “cool” action scenes, sexual titillation and so many other examples.

Teen Wolf is all frosting and no actual cake underneath. And normally I wouldn’t rag about this, because it’s a very elitist thing to expect all media to have intellectually-engaging content. Eating a spoonful of frosting is perfectly fine if that’s what you like.

The problem is that Teen Wolf pretends to be different. It’s dishonest in its presentation. It carefully arranges scenes in teasers and trailers to show itself as far deeper than it actually is. Teen Wolf is a soap opera with supernatural horror elements, and it’s not even socially progressive (though it likes to pretend it is). Even within the show, ominous plot threads are hinted at and then either discarded or solved in insultingly simplistic ways (and I have yet to see fan speculation that was less interesting than what the show actually presented), and never a plot thread is resolved without at least another hook thrown in to keep the audience perpetually hooked, despite the lackluster resolutions.

The emotional scenes are exploitative. They are not meant to further character development (as they are often quickly forgotten once their purpose has been fulfilled) and they certainly have little to no connection to the plot.

The plots are presented as complex, but they are in fact insultingly simple. There is always a single sentence that sums every season’s plot up, and the rest is decoration. These superfluous plot threads, designed to provide artificial complexity (and hook the audience with empty promises) are often discarded as the show throws yet more ominous plots at the viewer, trusting them to forget the disappointing resolution they just witnessed.

Teen Wolf masters the art of making filler not feel like filler. A good 50% of the episodes in each 12-episode arc is made up of events that seem dramatic and crucial, but will never be addressed again, and will leave no lasting impact on the show. And that percentage I just gave is, I fear, quite generous.

The show runner’s faults are numerous, and are likely responsible for the many problems with the show, but the greatest fault of all is the show runner’s obsessive enamourment with his own ideas. Actors leave and their characters are recycled. The archetypes are maintained, the originally-envisaged storylines are delayed but always find their way back to the show. And it is here that we find the source of the disingenuity, of the deceit, of the false presentation: the show runner is far too proud of himself to acknowledge his problems. And thus, they will never be fixed.

That is the problem with Teen Wolf: It believes itself to be worth far more than it actually is.

imjustateenagewasteland

Beautifully said. I agree. And I don’t feel like that’s how it was in season one. I feel like the showrunner had a leveled head. He kept his plots simple and you knew they were simple. The biggest question of that season was ‘who’s the alpha’ and it was solved in a simple but believable way. And then you see him move away from that structure in season two, by throwing two separate villains at you, and the way he solved Matt’s involvement was mind boggling and insulting. Then there was season three, where he threw two even more distinct and separate villains at you.

I think the problem with the way the show is told is that it’s hard not to notice how unprogressive it is. Especially with the show runner boasting about how progressive his show is. In season three, it’s hard not to notice that the only villains who died were the females. When a show is presented to you, it makes you a promise. It says ‘this is what i’m about, if that interests you, stick around’. Breaking bad, for example, was about seeing how much shit a man that our society views as a good man can do before he truly becomes a villain in the eyes of the audience. It was about watching what we perceive to be good men become villains and what we perceive to be throw away men become heroes. They held up that promise in my opinion. and in my opinion, that is one of the main structures a show needs to be truly good.

Teen wolf made us a promise too. It was supposed to be a teenage show about werewolves and season one fit nicely into that. It wasn’t too serious, it wasn’t too dark. But more importantly, it wasn’t too complex for Jeff Davis to be able to pull off. The problem now is that Jeff Davis wants to pull off more complex and intricate story telling but he’s still writing like he did in season one. The acting has stepped up immensely, and Jeff Davis hasn’t improved. He changed the promise of the show, but he hasn’t changed how he writes the show, and that’s causing him major problems story telling wise. The Showrunner is the weakest part of the show in my opinion.

agentotter

God there’s some great additional analysis in the reblogs of this post.

I wanted to throw in a thought about the difference between season 1 and the rest of the seasons we’ve had since, too, and it speaks to the greater problems the show has had since season 1, as well. All of the conflict in season 1 — ALL of it — was inextricably entwined with the characters themselves. Scott was struggling with his new nature, what it meant for him, how it involved him in the Hale and Argent family drama, the ways in which Peter was trying to exert control over him, his relationship with Allison and what her family’s history meant for him. Derek was dealing with losses both recent and historic, his own extremely personal role in what happened to his family, the reappearance of his own personal demon in the form of Kate, and eventually with the reality of having to kill the man who was (at that time) literally his only surviving family. Allison was dealing with the revelation of what her family did and who they were, what that meant for her and for her relationship with Scott, essentially the realignment of her whole world, and being plunged into a supernatural world just like Scott. Even the characters who were less central to that particular storyline, like Stiles, had a lot to deal with, and all of that conflict hinged on their relationships with the other characters. Like, learning that the supernatural is real doesn’t necessarily have to change your life if you’re not supernatural yourself. A character like Stiles could in theory just walk away from all of it. But he doesn’t because Scott is his brother. Chris is invested in everything not just because of his job because of his daughter. Jackson is motivated by his own insecurities, Peter by revenge, they all have goals and needs that are both integral and personal and that’s what the entire season is built around.

Later seasons not only neglect to give us character moments at all, they don’t really invest our characters in the conflict at all. Season 2 you start to see the dynamic break down, although our characters are still invested because they’re trying to save Lydia and Jackson (and later to save everyone else from Jackson), and some of the conflict is still personal for them because it’s Gerard and Victoria, but you start to see the direction the show is headed with Matt, who comes out of left field and has a backstory convoluted enough that a lot of viewers thought he was a literal ghost hellbent on revenge for his actual death. Our heroes mostly clash with him because they’re trying to save the town, yes, but also just because they’re in the wrong place at the wrong time (at the Sheriff’s station, figuring out it was Matt).

In 3A it all falls apart. Our sources of conflict are the Darach and the Alphas, who none of our characters even know; none of the conflicts presented really have anything to do with our actual characters, and not only does the plot start driving what the characters do, instead of the other way around, but the characters we actually care about are basically just caught in a meat grinder between these two opposing forces. The Alphas actually want Scott, sort of, maybe, but they’re relentless in their pursuit of Derek, and even after the resolution of that entire storyline I still have no idea why, whether they genuinely wanted him or if it was supposed to be a distraction or intimidation tactic, because mostly it seemed like an excuse for Derek to get tortured some more. Like really a lot. The Darach wants her revenge, and she kills a lot of bystanders to get it, but she also needlessly involves the local pack, going far beyond just working to get Derek on her side (again for reasons that make no sense within the plot) but also actively making enemies of Scott and his friends by threatening members of the pack and taking their parents for sacrifices. A lot of what happens in 3A makes no sense because literally the only reasons the villains act as they do is so that the main characters of this show will still have a reason to be on the show. Otherwise they’d be pushed entirely aside while Jeff chased down the obscure-plot rabbit hole after his shiny new characters (that nobody but him actually cares about).

The strength of 3B early on was that it brought a lot of that conflict back home, right to the kids’ doorsteps, and they were struggling with themselves and the consequences (oh my god consequences on Teen Wolf!) of what they did last season. They’ve made some problems more personal again, especially with Stiles (and in theory with Allison, but they’re either playing a long game there for another big reveal moment, or they’ve completely forgotten that she also has been having a darkness problem). I think they’ve actually done a great job with a lot of that, because this show’s weakness in these last few seasons has been completely abandoning character moments in favor of those BIG SCENES, that frosting as shadowknight brilliantly described it, and focusing the conflict on core characters is actually a winning strategy. But it’s faltered again as the show gets bogged down once more in big reveals and backstories we don’t care about, mythologies that are depicted as vast and complex while actually being shallow and nonsensical, random bombers and overacting bandage-faced mind monsters and fireflies. There are a lot of elements to this season that I think are really cool, but as shadowknight said, they fall apart because there’s no substance to them. They’re all frosting.

There’s a lot that’s made in fandom about “parallels” between seasons and in certain moments, but I’ve never seen the writers of this show as drawing any of those lines deliberately… there’s a difference between clever parallelism and stories and scenes that play similarly because you don’t have any new ideas. In season 1 it was “Who is the Alpha?!” (Which was a pretty decent mystery plot if you ask me, especially when they hit you with the reveal, and that ultimate confrontation was really visceral because the conflicts — between Kate and Derek and Scott, Allison and herself and her family’s expectations, Peter and his would-be murderer, Chris and his family, etc etc etc — were so personal.) In season 2 it was “who is the kanima?!” and season 3A was “who is the darach?!” and 3B started out with “who is the nogitsune?!” and is winding up with “who is going to die?!?!?!” That’s not a “parallel,” that’s what you call a one-trick pony. My guess is eventually they’re going to get a point where the question is going to be “who cares?” and I’m not sure that’s a riddle they’re ever going to solve when Jeff Davis is supposed to be the one providing the answers.

imjustateenagewasteland

That’s a very on point analysis. Season one made you care about the characters, which is what I enjoyed most, but you’re absolutely right. It didn’t just make you care about the characters, the conflict came from the characters, which is A plus story telling. And this all ties into my problem with Jeff as a creator (and as someone pointed out, he only wrote three of the twelve episodes in season one). And someone else actually mentioned this after the last episode - Scott seems to be a bystander in his own life. Which is the entire problem with recent seasons. Since the conflict is no longer coming from the characters, the characters are always reacting to conflict, instead of pushing it.

And I feel like Jeff realizes that he’s fucking up - because it makes his characters look extremely passive, like bystanders in their own stories, because he’s constantly attempting to tie the cause of the conflicts to characters. Like the nogitsune is tied to the golden trio because their sacrifice unleashed it, the darach was tied to Derek who gave the nemeton enough power to heal Jennifer. But when he does it like that, we don’t get to see the characters make those mistakes that drive the conflict, because their mistakes are made when they’re reacting to other conflict that they didn’t cause. His writing is less of ‘all actions have consequences’ and more of ‘there was literally no other move for these characters to make’ tone to it. In season two, Derek created the kanima because he was an asshole who bit jackson, probably hoping he would die. His asshole move had a very clear consequence. Season three makes those consequences a lot more murky, and drags the conflict away from the characters.

But since jeff is so into having these more and more complex storylines, we don’t get any other actual conflicts that are character driven. We don’t see Isaac dealing with his intense anger issues, or dealing with living with a guy that terrifies him (or with the mccalls); we don’t get Isaac’s opinion on whether he has anyone now or not. We don’t get Scott dealing with the extra power that comes with being an alpha. We don’t even get his fear at possibly losing his best friend. We don’t get Allison dealing with the deaths she’s suffered, or dealing with moving on from scott. WE DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW SHE FEELS ABOUT ISAAC. We don’t get stiles’s emotions on the nogitsune line, or how he feels about his father being involved, or how he feels about scott being more powerful, or about derek playing beta now. We don’t even get conflict with lydia and her banshee powers. Every individual conflict he presents is always one note and episodic, and immediately forgotten the next episode. None of it is developed or grown over episodes. None of it comes to a head. He’s devoting so much time to these complex seasonal arcs that his characters are forced to remain stagnant, or their character development comes out of left field and makes no sense. And in season one, that wasn’t the problem.

sulietsexual
rollinginthegalleons

sometimes i wonder why more people dont talk about feminist keira knightley

“Where are the female stories? Where are they? Where are the directors, where are the writers? It’s imbalanced, so given that we are half the cinema-going public, we are half the people [who] watch drama or watch anything else, where is that? So yes, I think the pay is a huge thing, but I’m actually more concerned over the lack of our voices being heard,” Knightley states in the mag. “I don’t know what happened through the ’80s,’90s, and ’00s that took feminism off the table, that made it something that women weren’t supposed to identify with and were supposed to be ashamed of. Feminism is about the fight for equality between the sexes, with equal respect, equal pay, and equal opportunity. At the moment we are still a long way off that.” 

and how she sued the dailymail for publishing a false article on her and anorexia, only to win £3000 and donate £6000 to a charity for those who suffer mental illness and eating disorders

plus the fact she did a topless photoshoot on the basis it wouldn’t end up being photoshopped, to draw attention to how “women’s bodies are a battleground and photography is partly to blame.”

“I’ve had my body manipulated so many different times for so many different reasons, whether it’s paparazzi photographers or for film posters. And that [shoot] was one of the ones where I said: ‘OK, I’m fine doing the topless shot so long as you don’t make them any bigger or retouch.’ Because it does feel important to say it really doesn’t matter what shape you are.” —An interview with The Times of London, 2014. 

caseymcdonald-deactivated201512

Anonymous asked:

why do you love dawn?

caseymcdonald-deactivated201512 answered:

okay anon you get the long version

to begin with i have a personal preference for teenage girls when it comes to fictional characters (and real life tbh), so my mind is set on “protect teenage girls at all cost” mode and dawn gets a lot of crap just for being one, i have to say. my love for her goes way beyond that, though. she gets to be very complex in a way that is possibly more subtle than other characters, but the phrase “you’re extraordinary” is definitely far from overdone.

she doesn’t have it easy to start with, what with the not being real and all that. remove her from any context and she is just a normal cutie teenager; moody, excited, protected. she likes school, she likes boys, she likes to irritate her big sister, she’s got an overprotective family, an absent father, basic stuff. nothing she can’t handle. then put her back in a house with the slayer, her sister who is powerful and possibly better than her, who won’t let her tag along with her during patrol or hang out with her when she has her friends/boyfriend around, a mother who loves her but is busy and overprotective just like her sister. that leaves you feeling inadequate (there’s a reason she gets along so well with willow, and then tara; little girls who never quite felt like they belonged and valued knowledge and learning for the fun of it)(note that what makes her so different than other people seeking knowledge on this show is that she does it simply for the sake of truth and not power, and that says a lot about her neutrality, objectivity and open-mindedness imo). so this overprotected very normal girl learns someday that she isn’t actually real. those memories, feelings and bonds that she’s always felt, her whole life have been fabricated. so her family isn’t really hers and she’s not real. honestly, i can’t even fathom. i have no idea what the hell i would feel in her place. but i see this arc a little like learning you’ve been adopted, and the feelings afterwards that nobody really wants you. it doesn’t help that people keep hiding things from her. that people keep leaving her. yet she pulls through this quite fantastically. and that is her first very real appeal to me, that she has so much strength. it is not unique to her, but she has it and it would be unfair to take it from her. it must run in the family, because summers women go through absolute shit yet they stand back up and keep going. give that girl the time to actually compute all that information and react to it (yeah she was freaked out i feel like that’s a fairly human reaction) and then she can live with it. you know how she goes “keys don’t have to go to school” at first and then she goes back to school because she can’t just stop living because of this shit.

i’m still not over how interesting this storyline is, though, that she is actually this neutral source of energy that has so much power it can open walls between dimensions. i say neutral because the debate on if the key is evil or not is key (pun!) to her arc like, it’s what use you do of the key that might be evil but not the key itself. and the key is now a person, with a conscience and the actual ability to make a difference between good and evil, and the ability to feel guilty for all the pain being what she is (who she is) can cause. it gets me every time when she goes “i must be something so horrible to cause so much pain and evil”. the martyr complex might be another summers woman tm character trait. but this leads to her deciding that the fate of the world is more important than her life, she is on the top of that tower and they are running out of time and dawn summers is ready to sacrifice herself to save the world. that is without mentioning how her blood tie to buffy makes her the most important fucking thing on the planet. that they have constructed this intricate relationship between sisters where they get on each other’s nerves and steal each other’s clothes but they love and protect each other at all cost. buffy loves her (fabricated) sister so much that she sacrifices herself instead. and dawn’s existence was essential to buffy’s quest of love and as a slayer. and it is so so important that this love that buffy found was sisterly love! it is so important and i hope i don’t have to explain why. so yeah dawn is probably the core of what makes season 5 my favourite.

so moving on to season 6. dawn’s mother and sister are dead, her dad still doesn’t give a shit, giles (her last actually able parental figure) leaves the country. we get beyond the feeling of inadequacy now, this is abandonment territory. she doesn’t even get to be over one person leaving or one person dying, they all go away one after the other and she can’t do anything about it. she still keeps a straight face though. even before buffy’s death she was losing interest in school (even though she loves it! let’s not gloss over symptoms of depression in a young person? she even hurt herself?) but kept going because she couldn’t be sent away, and now she lives with a robot buffy and her dead sister’s friends and carries on. she’s a person though. she’s tough, but she probably has way more on her shoulders than she can handle. and no matter how she came into this world she is still very real and she is a person and guess what… she screws up. absolutely lovely! give me a well rounded fifteen year old on a show where everyone else is an adult please! i have this problem where a friend of mine (and i assume many other people around the world and on this website) thinks that she serves no purpose after season 5 and she became useless. in the strict sense of the word she wasn’t the key anymore, so yeah… but do you really get rid of people once they don’t serve a specific purpose anymore? really? a sister? who is a complex individual? like, no she’s not fodder to anybody’s storyline anymore, she gets her own. and after all she has been through, in her damaged state, school isn’t as important anymore, and her cry for help is quiet but very real. she starts stealing, staying late, getting into dangerous situations. her sister comes back but isn’t quite the same and it looks like she doesn’t want her around anymore. it’s not just about not being the most important person in the world anymore, but not feeling important at all to anyone who should make her a priority because she is in their care. anyone who would have paid a little attention to her would have noticed. but they all had their problems, which is legitimate, but doesn’t take away dawn’s pain at being ignored. she lost a mother, a sister in more than two ways, a father and a father figure, her best friend because he was too busy having sex with her sister (so mad at u spike), another mother/sister figure in willow who was an addict and put her life in danger recklessly, and then tara. and guess what yet again she felt remorse for what she did, even though she is entitled as anyone else to fuck up. she went back to the stores to give back what she took. through the whole season she suffered in silence and put her own pain aside because she knew and understood that people around her had problems of their own. and she was being the most caring and supportive sister she could be, helping her sister through depression as much as she could, motivating buffy to stay alive and taking on house responsibilities. in the end she couldn’t be everything to buffy anymore and that was a lot on her. but they got though it.

i think season 7 is when her abilities are put in better use. sort of ironic because most people think it’s the season she is most boring i guess. well, she is definitely not an object of destruction or a depressed teenager anymore. and maybe she doesn’t really get a constant storyline either. but since she first appeared we’ve seen a little of her more feisty and sassy sides here and there. the brave girl who looks a vampire in the eye and asks if his threats are supposed to scare her or actually threatening a gang of vamps who got her chained up. the curious girl who seeks answers and sneaks out to get them, who cracks a joke about harry potter or giving birth to pterodactyls and has a clever pun hidden in her pocket for a rainy day. the one who wanted to be a part of the battle, insisted on helping with research and reading books about demons, watching her sister’s fighting techniques and being able to hold her own in a fight. but also the one that was shut down and protected. and when we get to s7 she doesn’t have to be protected anymore, buffy looked at her and saw her, what she could do, her potential, and realized that they could fight together and that she wanted to teach her. and look at her taking vampires on her own or translating dead languages and reciting old stories or performing exorcisms on her own to get to talk to her mother. and look at her protecting her classmates from ghosts or making friends with the suicidal girl to make sure that she’s safe or giving an inspirational speech to amanda about how special she is and giving over the power to her because it wasn’t hers and she’s not. special.

dawn summers has no magical power beyond the one she had within herself when she could be used to open doors between dimensions. she has no super strength or potential to be more than she is. but she doesn’t have to be. she loves to learn for the sake of knowledge and help because she can be a part of it and when the spotlight is not on her she gives up the stage and whispers the lines and she gives unconditionally everything that she can; chances, love, understanding, forgiveness, support. and stands up for the people she cares about and you damn well better believe that if she’s not special she is fucking extraordinary.

dailynarnia
dailynarnia

↳ prince caspian cast commentary ⇾ pevensie affection.
Georgie: Will and Anna, I think that’s the first time in both of the films when the Pevensie children have actually shown some kind of affection towards each other.
(sound of grumbling and disagreement from the others.)
Anna: We all hug Skandar in the first one.
Georgie: Apart from the hugging of Skandar… it’s just Skandar who gets all of the hugs.
Anna: I hug you at the Stone Table.
Skandar: Yeah, there are lots of hugs.
Georgie: Okay, actually, I’m going to take back what I said. In this film, that’s the only sign of affection that the Pevensie children show to each other.
Anna: You hug Will in the bear scene.
Georgie: Good point.
Will: Yeah, and in the Aslan scene.
Georgie: I’m just gonna shut up.
Skandar: It’s the only time in this five minutes where they show any affection!
#yeah the pevensies never show any affection #who would think that?
buffyboleyn

ajax-daughter-of-telamon asked:

Did Anne Boleyn not actively seek to become his queen? (not a rhetorical question; genuinely confused)

lissabryan answered:

    No, Anne Boleyn did not seek to be Henry’s queen, not at the beginning, anyway.

    The first year of Henry and Anne’s relationship can be better described as sexual harassment in the workplace than a romance. Anne spent most of 1526 trying to tactfully dodge Henry’s advances. She had told him she would be no man’s mistress, but he didn’t respect that.  

    In February, he made a public declaration of his interest in Anne, hoping the fawning attention of the court would pressure her into giving into his advances. it didn’t work. Anne still would not become his mistress. Henry now spent more time in his wife’s quarters than he had in years, but it was to visit Anne where she couldn’t escape his attentions.

    In May, it got so bad that Anne actually quit her job as a lady in waiting and retreated to Hever, where she refused to answer Henry’s letters and sent back his gifts. Henry’s letters to her at this point are full of pouting complaints that she won’t write back to him.

    Henry still wouldn’t take “no” for an answer and chased after her. He went to stay with a cousin of Anne, Nicholas Carew, whose house was a convenient distance from Hever so he could ride over at his leisure. It wasn’t like Anne could refuse to receive him at the house. She refused wherever she had agency, but in this she did not. No one could refuse the king admittance.

    Anne had to walk a delicate balance. If she had offended the king, it would have put her entire family’s future in danger. She undoubtedly faced pressure from her family and friends - who were benefiting from the king’s attentions to Anne with a stream of offices, appointments, and titles - to keep the king “happy” and not anger him. And so Anne had to remain polite and friendly, smiling while she tried to duck away from his reaching hands.

    Anne wanted what every girl of the era wanted, to make a good marriage. She was intensely religious, something that’s often forgotten in her on-screen portrayals, an evangelical with a reformist zeal. No matter what the king offered her, she would not sleep with any man unless he was her lawfully-wed husband. But she couldn’t find a husband while the king was pursuing her. No man would ask for her hand and risk enraging the king. And the longer the king chased her, the less people believed Anne could still be a virgin. Her reputation was just as ruined as though she’d been the king’s mistress in truth.

    Later writers, seeing how things turned out, have posited that Anne planned the whole thing from the start, “luring” Henry away from his wife with her sexy feminine witchery. They imbue her with supernatural foresight, as if she somehow knew if she ignored him, refused him, and left court, it would drive him mad with lust and he would leave his wife for her. But that’s ridiculous.  Anne could not have possibly hoped Henry would make her his queen when he was chasing her back in 1526.

    In the past, Henry had always gracefully backed away when a lady indicated she wasn’t interested in being perused by him. Henry had a very fragile ego and was pained by being refused. His way was to sniff around and drop hints, and if the lady was cool toward his overtures, he would step back quickly and pretend the whole thing never happened. “Interested in her? Huh! Me? No way. Maybe she was interested in me, but I wasn’t into her!” 

    In Anne’s case, he wasn’t taking the hint. Anne was as blunt as she could be without being outright rude, but he kept coming back, offering her larger gifts, and promoting her family members to higher offices with greater income. Her family must have despaired when Anne left court because it put her prestigious career as a maid of honor in danger, but even that drastic move wasn’t enough to push Henry off his course.

    Thomas Wyatt, who watched the whole thing and may have been in love with Anne himself, wrote a poem about it, Whoso List to Hunt. He portrayed Anne as a deer, fleeing for her very life, with Henry and others in pursuit. But Henry has already put a collar around the deer’s neck, proclaiming the prize as his own, whether she likes it or not. And though Anne seems “tame,” she has a wild longing to be free. But later writers have portrayed it as though it was the deer luring Henry into the hunt.

    While everyone knew by 1526 that Henry wanted to divorce Katharine (he’d stopped sleeping with her years ago and had told several people he thought his marriage to her was invalid), everyone fully expected his next wife would be a princess of the blood, someone who would bring him a huge dowry and an alliance with a foreign power. A king marrying a mere gentlewoman for love? The idea was ridiculous. All the time he was trying to arrange Henry’s annulment, Wolsey was planning the king would marry a French princess. Even he, who probably knew the king better than anyone, didn’t think Henry would really marry Anne.

    In 1527, Henry asked Anne to marry him. Two things are important to note here. First of all, a royal proposal was not a request. A woman did not turn down a proposal of marriage from a king. She just couldn’t. (Ask Kateryn Parr, who was in love with another man when the king proposed.) It’s not like today, when a woman has agency in deciding her marital future. In those days, if a man of appropriate rank and wealth approached for a marriage, the girl’s father would decide if the union was good enough and if it was, the girl was expected to accept. If his rank was much higher than her own, or her father’s, the girl and her father had no little choice in the matter. They could appeal to higher authorities, such as the king or cardinal, and they might put a stop to the match, but the girl’s opinion on the matter was inconsequential. In this case, there was no higher authority to whom Anne could appeal if she didn’t want to marry Henry.

     Secondly, once Anne had accepted, they were legally bound to one another. A betrothal was almost as legally binding as a marriage itself, requiring a dispensation from the pope to dissolve. Once she had accepted, Anne had to put her effort into furthering her marriage. If the king had changed his mind at this point, Anne would have been ruined. Few men would have been willing to take the king’s discarded “mistress,” and even with a papal dispensation freeing her from the engagement, her marital prospects would have been dim.

    In short, there is no evidence whatsoever that Anne had a grand, cunning scheme to make herself queen. It would have been a ridiculous plan, and incredibly reckless. “I’m going to risk inciting the queen’s hatred, the king’s anger (potentially ruining our family), and destroying my reputation around Europe on the off chance that this time Henry won’t back away when I refuse him. Because I’m just so awesome, he won’t be able to quit me, you know.

    Humans have a tendency to look back at events once they’ve occurred and see a master plan behind it all, but there’s simply no evidence of it. Instead, what we see is a young woman harassed in her workplace to the point of quitting her job, but was still unable to shake off her boss’s attentions.

dark-beer-to-wash-it-down

I want this all over my dash.